Clearly everyone is watching me, judging me, thinking that I have no money in my account and am attempting to fiddle the system.
Don't even get me started.
This is enough time to convince myself that the friendship is over and I have fucked up royally somehow.
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE SAY SOMETHING BEFORE I LOSE TRACK OF WHETHER THE VOICES IN MY HEAD ARE THE ONES TALKING OR IF I'M ACTUALLY SAYING THESE WORDS OUT LOUD!
I'm already a melting hot cake of a mess, why not throw a few thousand additional hormones into the mix huh?
Someone kill me right now.
Oh so you're off on holiday?? Well here's everything possible that could go wrong between leaving your house and arriving at the hotel and also you'll die.
Yes I did have a good weekend thank you but please stop asking me questions because I'm worried I'll start to mix up my words or say something borderline offensive and you'll block me on all social media.
The pressure to perform makes my mouth dry and throat close over.
Well now seems like as good a time as any to Google if Trump's hair is real or list all the reasons people could possibly hate me.
Who was looking at you first so you look back and then they look back at you and then you look back again to see them looking back at you again and now you wish you could take it all back because your palms are starting to sweat and this feels like the end.
Hi stranger, I struggle with intimacy with a new boyfriend but here's my vagina anyway.
I am going to be fired.
I'd best set two backups just in case tomorrows the day my alarm doesn't go off after working solidly for 31 years and I'm late for work.
Am I taxed, insured? Are my tyres legal? Has someone put a body in my trunk?
Does this outfit scream drug mule????
No, we need to talk now and also I have anxiety so tell me.
And spending the next 67 minutes over analysing it's tone.
All jokes aside, anxiety is a legitimate mental disorder that can wreak havoc on peoples' lives. If you're suffering from anxiety and live in the UK then you can speak with a professional here at the Push Doctor - the great new way that makes it available to see a doctor online on any app between the hours of 6am and 11pm.