I began my blog as a way of voicing my life in this little corner of the internet. I promised myself I would always be honest, accountable and above all, relatable.
I’ve never wanted to pretend to be something i’m not or act as if i’m perfect. I’m far from it and I like it that way!
You see the fun part of life is it’s forever changing and we can be the person we want to be with a little bit of effort and self belief. In fact how boring would it be if we woke up one day and said “Right, i’ve got all my shit together. Time to sit back and do nothing now.”
Life would be pretty mundane right?
So how do we evaluate where we are right now as an individual and make the necessary steps to improve? Easy. Reflection!
I’m guilty of letting others affect my overall wellbeing and emotional streak. Oh so guilty. I think this is partly today with my anxious nature and sensitive side; emotions seem to drown me at times and strip me of my voice.
Take my relationship for example. From time to time the BF sets off on his travels with work and this involves all expenses paid trips with friends, copious amounts of fun and plenty of sight seeing. It can be hard being the one left behind when you’re not able to share in the adventure, especially when you’re getting shit done back home like the washing and scrubbing the loo. Ew.
Obviously I miss him and that feeling can be heightened when something goes wrong like a leak under the sink, a light switch blowing or a trip to the hospital (they say things come in threes right?!)
But it’s not down to another human being to make us feel complete. Jerry Maguire had it wrong ladies.
The relationship we have with ourselves is the most important one we’ll ever have in our life.
And i’m probably not the first person to ever say that to you but I am telling you as a person who genuinely believes this statement to be true. Because I am living this very truth as I type.
I have felt the affects of putting all of your energy into one person or relationship and the hard thump your arse makes when you land on it after they live a part of their life which you can’t be involved in. Which happens all the time!
Aside from work or study or every day commitments, it’s un-natural to be with someone every second of the live long day. And if we really think about it, why would we want that?
That feeling I get when I leave the office and blare The Lion King’s Greatest Hits from my car speakers, that feeling doesn’t come from human interaction or a cuddle or some kind of reassurance that I am of importance to someone. It comes from the satisfaction that my working day is over, I have my 30 minute car journey to unwind AND I get to sing Hakuna Matata. Plus all the words they say in between singing because yeah, i’m cool like that. Deal.
I’m sure many of us have a situation in our life where we wished we had a little bit more time to spend with a loved one and could easily pick out the negatives. Less quality time together, missing out on moments together or even that worry and stress that can sometimes come from the separation. All completely acceptable and rational feelings.
But wouldn’t it be awesome if we could turn those all around and focus on the benefits we get instead?
Take my friend from school for example. Her husband works in the Police and was doing a shift that included 6 on and 4 off. This would result in her being alone, with her two kiddies I might add, for 4 nights on the trot. What was her response to this?
“It can get lonely but I just make sure I record all of my TV programmes and have them ready to go”.
BRILLIANT! We all know men can do that annoying question asking thing just as the good part’s about to happen so what a result this is! Then the 4 days he had off was spent with her and the kids. Quality time together.
Now i’m not saying we should start distancing ourselves from the human population or refrain from any outside interaction. But what I do hope is that we can make the most of the time alone we have and use it to better ourselves as a person.
Watch a movie, grab a massage, make that recipe you’ve had your eye on for a while or hell, throw on your pjs and have a frickin nap! You deserve it. We deserve it.
Having me time isn’t selfish, it’s a necessity. And I bet the results are worth it when you’re a much happier and balanced person in every other aspect of your life. Plus isn’t seeing someone you adore after time spent apart simply THE best???
Especially when they bring you presents.