Yep, at V Festival. Romance is not dead people.
But this isn’t an attempt to blast my unsuspecting ex, I actually owe him a hell of a lot.
You see heartbreak was a babe to me. Turns out all of the sobbing on my Mum’s shoulder, the nights spent out drinking till the early hours of the morning and leaving the door wide open when I came home for the dog to wander out of (true story), the stacks of money spent on retail therapy and the countless Facebook stalking for weeks after was totally worth it.
Ex boyfriend I thank you.
You showed me what I didn’t want out of a relationship, you showed me what I did want out of a relationship and hell you made me take a long hard look at myself and see how I could make changes for the better!
Some relationships aren’t built to last forever but if you can take a lesson from them then it’s time well spent. He and I weren’t meant to be but that doesn’t make us bad people, in fact I rather liked who he was as a person. Minus the tongue sucking in the tent of course.
It’s so much harder to look at things when you’re inside of the box and fate or whatever you want to call it always has this cheeky knack of getting you on the outside. Then some time later you can look back and realise “Huh, that wasn’t actually me. That wasn’t quite right.” That domesticated little bundle of home life wasn’t where I was meant to be just yet only I hadn’t quite realised it.
Your gut knows though. It’s that little nagging inside of you that just won’t quit no matter how hard you try to push it back down. Hey it’s likely he had the same gut feeling; it’s probably what lead to that magical lip locking in his wellies. But for whatever reason we both chose to ignore it and let things crumble instead of attacking the issue head on.
And that’s ok too.
Because ex boyfriend you have shown me how to trust my instincts.
My rational brain didn’t think packing up 26 years of life and starting all over again in a new country would be such a good idea but my gut was like “FUCK YEAH!!!” Do something amazingly scary and out of your comfort zone and enjoy every last bloody minute of it, even if it doesn’t work out! Because, life.
Life is unpredictable and petrifying and fun and painful and magical and the only thing we can ever really know for sure is that we owe it to ourselves to live it the very best way that we can.
So thank you ex boyfriend.
You opened up the door to this awesome little part of my life and I could’t be more ecstatic. My new love is a bit of a hottie too. And he likes to kick people.
Hope you’re doing well.